I would like to paint the way a bird sings.
— Claude Monet
#
A flashback
On a fund-raising spree
I contacted Asif Basra on WhatsApp
In my bulldozer style,
I asked “Oyeee how are you …. Please can you do a short video for Samaritan Mumbai’s emotional support helpline
Then I did my usual pitch: Blah blah blah (he must have downed the shutters long ago)
There was silence
I am not in a good space, he said
I paused
I called him, immediately
Tring tring tring
What happened
I cannot explain
Okay
Just back
Okay
I am in quarantine
Okay
And this … Covid thing
Okay
Taking care of … my parents
Okay
Right now, I am not in that frame of mind
Okay
I hope you … er … understand …
Sure, Yaar
Er … The thing is …No pressure
Hmm
Do contact Samaritans Mumbai whenever you feel like talking … and sharing
Hmm
We are anonymous, confidential and non judgemental
Hmmm
Bhai, tera number bhi nahi dikhega
Hmmmm
Naam nahi poochengey … Jo bolna hai bol de
Hm
And you know I am there just a call away
He laughed
What, I said
Jhande-wallli!!!
Aha, I said
Haan bhai haan
(He called me that, haan bhai haan)
Jhandewallii!!! Haan baba
haan zaroor
Pakka haan pakka
Take care yaar
Then he disconnected
And then I said adieu
That was my final audio and WhatsApp guftagu with Asif
#
We can be knowledgeable with another man’s knowledge, but we cannot be wise with another man’s wisdom.
— Michel de Montaigne
#
Then the news of his demise
trickled in
It was like a crumbling of a
mountain inside me
As if a volcano erupted
Then silence
We have known each other
for years during his theatre days
Of late we met less
When we did, we were a
house on fire
We had long conversations
which never ended
Lots of drama
Lots of nautanki
Lot of theatrewallah’s high art
Plays
Films
Poems
But above all, political and ideological discussions
Zindabad vs Murdabad
#
In philosophy, if you think the answer is obvious, you haven’t understood the question.
— Keith Frankish
#
News of his suicide
I felt like a zombie
I disconnected from all social media
I needed to store and remember the good memories
#
Autumn shows us how beautiful it is to let things go.
— Vesna Zivkovic
#
MY GOOD MEMORIES ….
Underlined….
And then when I started my
social media account
A barrage of comments
And mostly WHY ….
.
He was always smiling
As someone said, The Boy
Who Never Stopped Smiling
No way, it can’t be true
Conspiracy theories erupt again
Finger pointing
Gossip
In the pandora’s box which
Stephen Fry calls social media
#
If we winter this one out, we can summer anywhere.
— Seamus Heaney
#
He was struggling
He was going through depression
A person can smile and be sad
Can you accept it?
The social media rants
No No….
He cannot do this to the love
of his life
To his family
To his innocent parents
No No No
Not possible
People, do you see it’s all
about you
It is not about him
You feel bad, about yourself
How come, if you were a close friend, how could you
not see
How come as a fan, you see
a coward who could not take
up the life challenges
How COULD YOU NOT
HELP ?
Instead you say he let YOU
down
You felt he did wrong
#
Some people have one great dream in life which they fail to fulfill.
Others have no dream at all and fail to fulfill even that.
— Fernando Pessoa
#
For once
Can we just see his pain
He ended his pain
I am sure he must have tried
But that sensation of floating …
Beyond boundaries
Beyond logic
Beyond this planet which is
three quarter dead
#
If you’re reading this, if there’s air in your lungs on this November day, then there is still hope for you.
— Jamie Tworkowski
#
He took a call
To end his pain…
Can we respect his decision?
कोई कश्ती में तनहा जा रहा है, किसी के साथ दरिया जा रहा है…
— मोहसिन ज़ैदी
Kamayani Bali- Mahabal
November 17, 2020 at 1:00 pm
The write-up gives in-depth insights about Asif and the legacy left behind for readers and lowers of art and theatre
November 18, 2020 at 4:37 am
SO SAD,But nice post
January 20, 2021 at 1:00 pm
This is very helpful. Thanks for sharing.