Lotus position


Jug Suraiya
03 April 2014, 10:57 PM IST


English: Albert Einstein Français : portrait d...

English: Albert Einstein Français : portrait d’Albert Einstein (Photo credit: Wikipedia)



Einstein’s formula — E=MC {+2} — proves that Modi is blameless for the 2002 riots


Seeing a long queue, Jugular Vein decided to join it. Maybe they were giving away free AAP caps, or Modi masks, or RaGa designer stubbles which you stuck on your face with gum. But it turned out to be none of these. It turned out to be the local recruitment centre of the Bharatiya Janata Party. There was a doorman standing by a gate with a large lotus symbol on the wall beside it.


Doorman : So, what are your qualifications for wanting to join the BJP?


JV : Actually none whatsoever. In fact, i don’t want to…


Doorman : No qualifications whatsoever? Perfect. That’s exactly what we’re looking for. Just sign here and you’ll become a full-fledged member. Welcome to the BJP!


JV : No, no — you misunderstood me. I don’t want to join your party. I just want to know why everyone, including MJ and a lot of others, from Congress and sundry parties, are flocking to BJP. What gives?


Doorman : What gives is NaMo, our PM-in-waiting. He’s transformed BJP from the kamal, or Lotus, party, to the kamaal, or wondrous, party. There’s not just a NaMo wave; there’s a NaMo tsunami.


JV : NaMo? But weren’t some of these people who are now joining up calling him an accomplice to mass murder just a little while ago?


Doorman : Accomplice to mass murder? It’s been scientifically proved he isn’t.


JV : Scientifically proved? By whom?


Doorman : By Einstein, as in Albert. You know his famous formula: E=MC {+2} ? It means when mass reaches the speed of light it becomes energy. So mass can never be destroyed, or murdered. And if mass can’t be murdered, there can be no mass murder and no accomplice to it. QED.


JV : Wow! So thanks to Einstein and his E=MC {+2} there are no accomplices to mass murder, no Hitlers, Stalins, Maos, Pol Pots, any of those guys?


Doorman : That’s right. That’s what the theory of relativity is all about: everything is relative to everything else. Including mass, which can’t be murdered, as Einstein proved. Relatively speaking.


JV : Relatively speaking, who else is planning to join the BJP?


Doorman : Well, we’re yet to get a signed application form from AK, or from shehzada, but barring that almost everyone else wants to join us. Including a certain Amma down south.


JV : Amma? But didn’t she want to form a Federal Front, to fight both Congress and BJP?


Doorman : The Federal Front is exactly that: a front for Amma to federate with NaMo.


JV : But i thought she wanted to be PM herself.


Doorman : And so she shall be. NaMo will make her PM — Permanent Monarch — of Tamil Nadu.


JV : I’m sure she’ll make a very good PM for TN. But what with everyone wanting to join it maybe the BJP should change its name. How about the Bandwagon Jumping Party, since everyone wants to jump onto its bandwagon?


Doorman : Oh, NaMo’s thought of a much better name than that. How about the Modi Monopoly Manch…?




Read more here — http://blogs.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/jugglebandhi/entry/lotus-position1



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