Rai Atul Krishna, Hindustan Times Bihar, July 30, 2013
It is never easy for a dalit girl in Bihar to dream big. Caste roles
remain well defined in our state and it’s not often someone breaks
free from the mould.
Yet, I dreamt of becoming a computer engineer. I was encouraged to
pursue my dream by my father, Sailesh Paswan. A daily wage
construction worker who barely earns enough to make the ends meet for
our family of four, he wanted me — the elder of his two daughters — to
be one up on all the boys of our community.
So, unmindful of his meagre earnings, my father did the seemingly
impossible: he put me in a Plus-2 college and was making me undergo
coaching at Danapur, near Patna, to take the engineering entrance
Life was never easy but the hope of a rewarding future kept me going.
Trips from my native Chitnawan village, under Maner police station of
Patna district, to my college and coaching institute in Danapur were
But I thought nothing of my daily grind that the 22-km trip entailed.
Then, late in the night of October 21, 2012, my whole world came
crashing around me.
A few minutes short of midnight, four youth from my village climbed
onto the roof of our single-storeyed Indira Awas Yojana house at
Chitnawan, as I slept there with my younger sister, Sonam.
READ: Treatment of acid attack victims should be free: Krishna Tirath
Two of them held my hands and the other two intruders poured almost a
litre of acid on my face. As I writhed in agony, they laughed at me.
One of them said: “Now you see we do whatever we say.”
Some of the acid fell on Sonam as she tried to save me. My shrieks
brought my mother Sunaina rushing to the roof. But the assailants
deliberately stood there for a while before leaving, as if to enjoy
These boys had been harassing me for months. They used to pass vulgar
remarks, pull my chunni and follow me on their motorcycles when I went
to Danapur for my Plus-2 classes and coaching.
When I did not respond to their overtures, they turned abusive and
threatened to teach me a lesson I would never forget. Focused as I was
on my career goal, I thought nothing of it. How wrong I was.
For months after the incident, nobody came to help us. Even the local
mukhia (village headman) and the area MLA avoided visiting us, let
alone helping us, as the culprits are from a dominant community.
Since then, internet campaigns by several NGOs and a Maner-based
social activist have had many people pledging their support for my
treatment and rehabilitation. A Ranchi-based plastic surgeon has even
promised to reconstruct my face.
When the acid attack was reported in the media, the Scheduled Castes
commission stepped in and we, the two sisters, got a compensation of
R2.42 lakh between us. The money, which was not enough to begin with,
is long gone.
I have been told that the badi adalat (Supreme Court) has ordered
compensation and free medical treatment for acid victims like me. This
has rekindled the hope in my heart.
If my face can be restored, this dalit ki beti still has it in her to
make something of her shattered life. Jab tak saans hai, tab tak aas
hai (Till there’s life, there’s hope).
But the sarkar (government) has not done much for me so far. We have
just returned from Delhi’s Safdarjung Hospital after receiving
treatment for some complications in my neck. The doctors there told me
I have 90 per cent burns on my face. But we are left with no money for
Those who ruined my life are in jail. But no progress has been made in
the case as my statement under Section 164 of the CrPC has not been
recorded even almost nine months after the incident.
We met IG saheb (Arvind Pandey, IG, CID – weaker sections) on December
31 last year and he had promised early action in this regard. Then my
father met the Patna district magistrate in April this year. But my
statement has still not been recorded.
Earlier, the excuse given for the delay was that I was not fit to
speak owing to the severe burns on my face.
Though I am now able to speak easily, my statement has still not been
recorded for reasons unknown.
I want exemplary punishment to be handed out to the culprits so that
it dissuades others like them from ruining the lives of innocent
girls, who are pursuing their dreams under trying circumstances.
But neither the police nor the government seems serious in pushing my
case. Perhaps, they think I am a poor, helpless dalit girl, not worth
bothering about. Or, this is the situation maybe because the culprits
belong to a dominant group.
But I will pursue the matter till my last breath. My father tells me I
am a brave girl, full of fight. I will prove him right. I won’t give
up till the end.
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