Poem by famous Malayalam poet – Balachandran Chullikkad. In current issue of Mathrubhumi Illustrated
Translation By Binu Karunakarana
Indian without an Aadhaar
by Balachandran Chullikkad
Court: Do you have Aadhaar?
Accused: No I’m Niraadhaar
Court: Hope you got a name?
Court: Don’t you have any other?
Court: Name your father?
Accused: Mahatma Gandhi.
Court: Isn’t he the father of the nation?
Accused: Don’t know if there’s another one.
Court: And your mother?
Accused: Bharat Mata.
Court: You got to be an orphan?
Court: No. I’ve a guardian. The President.
Court: (Annoyed) Anything else to tell the court?
Accused: When memories rise…
Court: (Interrupting) A story of yourself?
Accused: Story without self.
Court: Cut the long story short.
Accused: It’s not much.
Court: Go ahead
Accused: When memories rise I was licking turd on a railway track.
Court: Yuck! What the heck!
Accused: Had no free ration since I had no ration card.
Court: Oh! Malnutrition.
Accused: Not really. Had banana skins on day and cum shot by cops in the night. And flies, in my dreams.
Court: (With contempt) Anything more?
Accused: That’s all I got.
Court: (Turning red) Stop it
Accused: (Politely) I rest my case
Court: It has been proved beyond doubt that the accused stabbed to death a religious preacher sermoning at the railway station ground. But considering the mental health of the accused the court orders incarceration in a mental asylum for life.